favorite conversation everrrr

"I'm sad tonight." I said to a dear friend.

"Oh dear, what shall we do about that?" she replied.

"I just don't know. I wish I could make sense of everything. I wish people didn't hate me. I wish I could just start over."

"Not all people hate you. Probably very few people hate you! Maybe you need a vacation?"

"I am on vacation! I don't think anyone hates me, I just wish people would think better of my intentions."

"The important people know the truth."

"I know God knows. I just wish I could know. I wish they would believe in me. Do you ever wonder if it was just a big mistake to follow Jesus?"

"Yes I do. Kind of alot actually." She accented her statement with a smiley face to empathize with my dilemma.

"The only thing that holds me here is remembering how things used to be. I can't live on my own. But I feel like things are just so hard all the time."

"I hate that it's hard, I don't understand it." She says, sadly.

"Life will always be hard regardless of who we're living for," I reasoned. "It just confuses me that the Lord's plan is so destructive to me. I don't feel ready for it. I wish His plan was more loving and encouraging than soul destroying and painful."

"I am positive that His plan is loving in a way we do not see," her answer rings through my head.

"But why does everyone have to reject me? Why do I have to be alone? I wasn't ready and I've barely made it. It doesn't seem good to me."

"Well... when Jesus was beaten, rejected, and alone on Calvary it probably didn't seem like a loving plan either. But we know it was the most loving plan ever." She is always very down to earth. A wise girl.

"Yeah, it just hurts. I feel like that's all that is in store for me. Pain and rejection."

"Well I know the feeling. But I know you have hope for the rest of the plan or you would turn from Jesus right now," she stated very plainly.

"Well, I can't help it. I don't know why it's there. But it is. For some reason deep in my heart through the hurt, I think I'll get through this alive. Don't you feel it too?"

"Yeah I do... it drives me nuts!" She finished. I smiled and thought through the conclusion we had come to. The bible says the Spirit testifies with our spirits that we are His children. There really is no other way. I follow Jesus. Through unbearable pain and sorrows I walk as best I can in obedience, just like He did thousands of years ago. It'll all be okay in the end. It will all be okay soon. Soon, we shall see Him.